16. The Big Decision

DancefloorLife went on as usual in San Diego only I didn’t go out dancing much anymore, and only saw Darla and Danielle occasionally now. On one of these occasions, we were at a club on one of the bases. Everyone was dancing and having a great old time. I was sitting at our table, drinking my 7-Up (I had given up the beer as I never liked the taste in the first place) and I noticed that Jack, one of the guys who often came over and joined us, was looking rather depressed and seemed to be in his own little world. He just sat there staring at his glass of beer.

“What’s the matter, Jack?” I asked. “I’m just thinking how screwed up my life is,” he replied. “I hate the navy. I just joined to get away from home. I don’t know what I’m doing here. Everyone’s so friggin’ messed up!” He used some other choice words, however. I told him that I knew what he meant. I related to how my friends and I were before we started clubbing, and how it hurts to see my two best friends get involved with everything and the path that they’re following. I asked him why he didn’t get out.

“Because I’m stuck in this( blankity blank) place for four (blankity blank) years! I committed to four years and I can’t get out before then! I wish I had never joined!” He then looked up at me and said, “But you’re lucky. You don’t have to be here. You should leave. You’re not like the other whores in this place because that’s what they all are, just a bunch of whores looking to get laid. You’re a real lady and you shouldn’t be in a dump like this. You don’t belong here with these whores. If I were you, I would leave and never come back. It’s too late for me, but it’s not for you.”

Jack then asked me what I wanted to do in life. I told him about my dream of becoming a film make-up artist, and how I was saving my money to go to this makeup academy in Los Angeles. “You should do it,” he said encouragingly. “You should just pack up and move up there and go after your dream. Just forget all about this stupid place, and go and make your dreams come true!”

I felt another little flicker of hope in my chest. This was the first time anyone had ever encouraged me to follow my dream … the first time anyone hadn’t laughed or told me that I could never do something like that. It was the first time that someone really believed in me, and that really felt great!

When I left the club that night I thanked Jack for helping me to make an important decision, and I wished him the best of luck. I truly felt sorry for him and the fact that he was stuck in his situation whether he liked it or not. The military back then was full of drunken potheads … not the type of people I wanted to hang around with anymore. Jack was right. It was time for me to move on.

 

 


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